We grieve at the news of the deaths of the school children and staff in Connecticut. The horror of the crime revolts us. We ask, “Why?”
Grief is abetter response than anger. Anger will seek to place blame elsewhere and seek some sort of revenge, a scapegoat. Was the shooter sick? Were the parents unfit? Was the school to blame? Eventually, a clue will be discovered, and a scapegoat blamed. It will seem to put this outrage to rest and allow us to go back to our normal routines.
One of my teachers of peace, John Dear, S.J shared on a retreat that here were only two emotions that were recommended in the Beatitudes: joy and grief. Anger had no place and needed to be converted to grief.
Grief takes us deeper and allows us to look for our own responsibility in all of this. Do our ‘normal routines’ insulate us from those who are marginalized… the poor, the mentally ill, the broken and outcast people in our communities? Are we doing all we can to keep all people connected and part of our community?
Grief ends the need to blame-ourselves or others. We may want to repent of our complicity in this tragedy. Do our ‘normal routines’ signal tacit support to the very violent society we live in? Have we become too jaded to think we can make a difference? We may be personally peaceful people, but do we express our discomfort/ outrage/ opposition to the violence all around us? If not, these tragedies will themselves become normal routines forcing us into narrower and narrower circles of engagement.
We risk being as insulated from the death of children in school shootings as we are already insulated from the deaths of children starved in our cities, or those killed by drone strikes in Pakistan and Afghanistan, or by economic sanctions in Iran. These are the children being killed in our name, for our “security.” Yet we let those tragedies continue unopposed.
We live in a culture birthed in, and deeply addicted to violence. From the massacre of Native Americans to the enslavement of African-Americans through lynching and its more legalized counterpart, the death penalty, by “winning” world wars and by “surgical” drone strikes we have been taught—and passed on—the myths of redemptive violence. “Might makes Right”
Children are raised on cartoons depicting violence as the solution to every conflict… brought to you by Hasbro’s GI Joe. For my generation, Popeye the sailor comes to mind. A can of spinach at the right time and you can rip Brutus limb from limb to save Olive Oil.
Today’s air waves are full of cop shows and detective series where the ‘good guy’ gets the ‘bad guy’ often through the use of deadly force. In the end, we are led to believe that violence saves us. And we believe it. Violence is the disease that is killing us.
And we wonder why a disturbed young man would turn to violence to fix his world?
Martin Luther King Jr. warned us the night before he was assassinated that our choice was no longer between violence and nonviolence but between nonviolence and non-existence.
Perhaps there is enough motivation in the deaths of these innocents to save us from ourselves. Maybe, through their intercession, we will come to see that there is no future in violence.
Nonviolence is not passivity in the face of violence, oppression or injustice.
Nonviolence, as used here, is a poor English rendition of Gandhi’s term “satyagraha” or truth force. It is a belief so deeply grounded in seeing the sacredness of each person that it recognizes people are not evil but sometimes do evil things. It and sees the hurt and pain that drives people to evil acts. Nonviolence is willing to sacrifice. It seeks reconciliation rather than victory. it does not count winners and losers. It believes wholeheartedly that love is more powerful than hate.
So we can begin a process of healing by grieving deeply over this loss of life and of innocence. Let us refrain from blaming others until we have looked within.
We cannot stay within for long, our nation needs to witness us turn away from violence in all its forms.
I believe that nonviolence is a better way. In Jesus, God demonstrated that Love conquers hate.
More to follow…